Tuesday, June 8, 2010


just last night, i was chatting with corey online. he is in costa rica for the summer living the dream. it just so happened we were online at the exact same time; and thank heavens we were. after an hour long chitchat, more like heart to heart, i felt rejuvenated. he was full of advice; the type of advice you can only encounter from a beloved brother. i had expressed the feelings and concerns of my heart and he instantly said all the right words. i'm thankful for the relationship i have with him. to be honest, we never have really opened up quite like that before. who knows, maybe it was the miles between us that in turn made us feel closer. or maybe it was the convenience of having a computer screen relay our words rather than standing face to face. whatever it was, i'm forever thankful for the advice, love and deep concern i felt from him. listen up! i thought i would share one simple thing he said to me...

"The problem in my opinion, is that the grass is always greener, especially when it comes to a partner. But what I think is the goal is to find someone that makes you mostly happy and work on the things that may not be perfect. We need to search for those who we have to work the least with. Its easier if the only thing that bugs you about your partner is maybe how they sip their soup or something simple."

simply brilliant. i loved that. one of his many definitions of love.

as far as his advice for life? he told me...

"a friend of mine said recently that 'all those who wander are not necessarily lost'. thats how i feel. I dont need more money than i have now- i do what i want when i want."

i know you may be a little lost, considering you only read the bits and pieces... but take heed to generic advice.

and remember, "all those that wander are not necessarily lost".

thanks core. i sure love ya.

summer at last

it's day six of our little trip to california. who wants to go house hunting when you can lay out? we boycotted the search for our future home and decided to soak up the sun. it was lovely. nothing better than sun rays, vitamin d, and a tan line. yum. too bad you aren't here to join in on the fun. who knows, maybe next year you can all come visit us! lay out by our future pool, drink our future lemonade and laugh about our future experiences. enjoy the gorgeous day out there!

Sunday, June 6, 2010


lately, i seem to be thinking and pondering. a lot. differently, than i have before. my brain is into deliberately thinking about every single little detail of my life. it's as though my brain bought a ticket for a never ending roller coster ride.

why is it, that when we tend to think too hard about things we stress out, worry or even become sad? i feel as though i've fallen into a little rut. i can't seem to get out. help me.

i think, think, think and think some more. every decision or thought has to go through a a vigorous thought cycle in my head before i am satisfied with it.

i look at food, and i think. i pray, and i think. i look at my body, and i think. i look at him, and i think. i look at wedding magazines, and i think. i look at the past, and i think. i also look at him, and i think. i look at friendships, and i think. i look at the future, and i think. i go on a walk, and i think. i look at apartments, and i think. i evaluate my life, and i think.

a hard think. not your typical, everyday think.
this is a think that drives me crazy at times.

i want to be normal again.
a little more carefree. a little more believing in myself and my decisions. and a little more positive.

the advice, "stop and think about it" usually fixes all problems.
i now need someone to say, "stop thinking."
but, seriously.
what has gotten into me?

think. think. think. here i go again.

{photo by anna gay}

Friday, June 4, 2010


silly, dumb and not the greatest picture.
oh, well.
there's nothing wrong with having fun.
have a fun-filled weekend. love you all.


well, well, well...

i am in MODESTO yet again.
and couldn't be happier.
i feel back at home, actually.
can't explain how lovely it was to
sit, laugh, talk and drink diet coke with joe.
boy, have i missed him.
and that's an understatement.

last night was graduation.
today is house hunting
tomorrow is san francisco
nothing but fun.

i'm stoked to be on "vacation"
especially with my lovebird.
he's so stinkin' good to me.
no doubt in my mind that our
future life together will be nothing
"short" of incredible.

as for now, i've got to go.
we have lots to do.
wish us luck in finding a cute little place to live.